Think, uh, Better

Calling someone “gainfully unemployed” (no, that’s not a typo), even when meant as an insult, is actually a compliment.

I know, I know, award shows aren’t exactly the place to glean essential life lessons, but these aren’t exactly essential life lessons. They’re more like casual observations that have an element of something resembling something worth knowing. So, here they are. The ten things I learned from this years Oscars, in order of increasing importance,…

There was a man who worked at Central Market in South Lake, Texas. His job was a little awkward. He wasn’t a cashier or a bagger or a stocker. He was an attendant. Every time I saw him, he was positioned where the shelves of chips met the end of the chocolate aisle, midway between…