How I Developed My Allergy to Offices

1 – It’s time to get out of the shower, but instead of drying off you just stand there with the towel wrapped around you wishing you’d never gotten in in the first place. 2 – You wake up having to pee in the middle of the night and really consider just peeing the bed….

Charlie Daniels is in a new Geico commercial. Playing the fiddle. Awesome. No sighting of the Geico gecko though. This is a major fail. They totally could have done a “Devil Went Down to Georgia” thing. Classic, it would have been.

Typing one-handed is difficult, but for some unknown reason, typing one-handed while holding half of a grapefruit in the other is twice as difficult.

I saw Aunt Mary on Sunday. I sat on the edge of her bed in the nursing home, next to the wheelchair she has to ride in, despite the fact she can hold up her own feet when someone is pushing it. Half the time, her head was bent down against her chest, her eyes…