5 + 3 = Fe

Do you all know about the movie 5ive Girls? Don’t worry if you don’t. In fact, not knowing about it is kind of a tribute to your taste. It’s not like people are going to be popping the anniversary disc of 5ive Girls into their high-def, Blu-Ray, ultimate infinity DVD players in 20 years, turning to their guests and announcing, “This, my friends, was a masterpiece of Canadian cinema.”

Anyway, the movie exists, two reasonably hot chics kiss in it and, outside of that, it pretty much lacks any redeeming quality. Well, except for the one scene where the girls are sneaking around the five-student school at night and the blind girl… well, let’s just say that I laughed hard enough to make it worth sitting through the other 90 minutes and it was a jolly enough surprise that I don’t want to spoil it for those who of you have a sudden pulsating desire to update your Netflix queues.

There is also a movie called Thr3e. Not to worry native Spanish-speaking people. You have your very own equivalent, a short film out of Mexico titled Tr3s.

And let us not forget Numb3rs, perhaps the first letter-phobic TV show title of the 21st century.

Good people of the planet Earth, numbers are not letters. And they are not interchangeable. You cannot replace a letter in a word with a number to make it look pretty and then pronounce it the same. 5ive Girls is “Five-ive Girls”. Numb3rs is “Numb-Threers.” Quit being assholes.

Besides, we all know e=mc².