… and also how to know if you’re a ninja at heart.

So, last night my nephew was IMing Shawna on Facebook and it was decided that, while it is normally mean to call someone a punk, it is quite alright to call me a punk. Just in case any of you have been hesitating to do so.

In retaliation for this decision, I sent a text to my vowel-challenged nephew and called him a punk back. And then he replied to me. And, where there should have been comprehension, there was a contorted expression of WTF all over my face. We actually had to go to Urban Dictionary to decipher part of his text. It was at that point that I realized that, no matter how many times I get carded at R-rated movies, I am officially an old fuck.

A few minutes ago, I glanced at the phrase “Kill Fungus” and saw “Kung Fu.” It was then that I realized that, no matter how much of an old fuck I am, I’m still a super-stealth ninja, lean, mean and ass-kickin’.

This is a Sponsored Post written by me on behalf of Moviestorm. All opinions are 100% mine.

Are you familiar with Moviestorm? If not, let me give you a little info on what it is and what exactly you can do with it. So, basically Moviestorm is this virtual movie studio. With Moviestorm you actually get the chance to create your own little animated movies. How cool does that sound? Now, I know what you are thinking next. How much does it cost? Right? Well, it is a subscription based service that only costs you $8 a month. Pretty low for something that sounds so cool, eh? Well, if you are wondering what it is like before you pay there is actually a free version for both Windows and Macs that is on the Moviestorm website. You can try that out and see what you think about it. You will be able to do everything from horror movies to cool sci-fi movies with Moviestorm. And here is the really cool part - the Moviestorm Challenge . What is it? A way for you to win a cool $2k iMac. Booyah! All you have to do is get to work making a kids movie with Moviestorm. If you make one and it gets on TV then you get the prize. See the website for full details.

It’s like the aftermath of Christmas. I woke up this morning knowing that something truly fantastic was awaiting me. But now, it has been opened, and though it will continue to bring me pleasure for many years to come, I know what was in the package and I no longer have it to look forward to.

Anyway, Redhead was adorable. Sadly underused, but wonderfully worth watching. Hopefully it won’t be months before she is heard from again.

And Vanessa Williams is still killer hot.

Earlier tonight, we dug our car out of the foot of snow that the genius who has been driving the Bobcat around our complex all day pushed up on all sides of it.

With frying pans. I may lack a lot of qualities that I wish I had, but ingenuity isn’t one of them.

Fun reading —> 30 lbs of Pot Found in Jesus Pictures

My favorite part is when they equate hiding pot in Jesus pictures to hiding pot in senior citizens and children. I’m not even sure that hiding pot in Jesus would compare to hiding pot in senior citizens and children.

Without the sexy pants.

Other things I’ve learned this week:

Minivans are the new station wagons.

Super Bowl XLIV topped the Mash series finale as the most watched television broadcast of all time… supposedly.

It doesn’t matter who beats you to the fitness room. They will always be watching a talk show.

You should never step in a snow pile just because you think it is shorter than your boots. It isn’t.

Tulips thrive in coffee-infused water.

A really bad metal splinter is like a shiv for very tiny elves.

Wherever there are writers having a fairly decent night, there is always a snarky editor lurking to tell the writer just how much they suck.*

*not intended for web-renowned fic betas

And it was simply too damn cold to go out and play.

Which is unfortunate. The Super Bowl is always good for creating empty movie theaters and grocery stores. But, alas, we chose not to freeze our asses off to take advantage of it.

We did, however, stumble across this —> Puppy Bowl VI

Puppies going crazy on a fake football field. Bunny cheerleaders. A hidden camera in the water bowl. A blimp piloted by hamsters.

If the Super Bowl were this entertaining, I totally would have watched it.

So, a group of ambitious (and clearly awesome) Facebookers started a fan page to lobby for Betty White as host of SNL. How f’in cool would that be? I’ll tell you. Pretty f’in cool. So, if you have a Facebook, and I think most everyone does but me, and you would like to join this honorable cause, you can become a fan of Betty White on SNL. I have to admit, this is the first time I’ve really felt compelled to get a Facebook.

In the land of Teeneelegs live a band of  princesses. Bound by no laws, slaves to no morality, the princesses suffer only one rule.

Their feet must never touch the ground.

Transported to and fro in palanquins balanced on the shoulders of young, shirtless peasant boys, and attended by waiting maids willing to fulfill any demand, the princesses want for nothing.

But never shall they walk. For if, even for a single instant, they make use of their legs, the princesses will be forever banished from the land of Teeneelegs-

- where shoemakers from all across the globe go to take measurements and build prototypes for their knee-high boot lines.

Does everyone know that Redhead is going to be on Ugly Betty next Wednesday? Do you all know that she’s like the lead guest star in the episode? Do you realize that she was supposed to be on tonight, but that Ugly Betty was preempted last week because some people care about the state of the union or something, which pushed last week’s episode to tonight and Redhead’s episode seven days further away from me?

Are you aware that when you type “Redhead” into IMDB, it doesn’t actually bring up Redhead? I found this out by accident earlier when I momentarily forgot that the entire world doesn’t refer to Redhead as Redhead. Don’t worry. When you type in Aubrey Dollar, Redhead’s page comes right up.

So, it’s February 10th, ABC (not my fault), 10pm.

Charlie Brown Valentine is on at 8pm the same night. If you’re going to hop into bed with the devil, you may as well do every position.