March 14th, 2008 Riley
It shall be a good month in the pursuit of debt removal.
Tax Returns = Paid Off Credit Cards
But Tax Returns also equal Screenplay Contests.
And that’s where some of the damn money is going, ya hear?
You see, I’m sitting on a gem, despite what Final Draft and Disney had to say about it. I know that I’m sitting on a gem. Team Tripe knows that I’m sitting on a gem. And soon the world will know that I’m sitting on a gem.
Not only is the screenplay in question quite phenomenal, if I do say so myself, but it has the greatest title, like, ever, and unlike the vast majority of screenplays I’ve written, it has a male lead, which means that it actually stands a chance of selling! Woohoo!
Buckle your seatbelt, Tripe. You’re goin’ down.
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November 26th, 2007 Riley
So, it’s hard to win a screenplay contest without putting forth great effort. With that in mind, I’m probably going to lose. But if winning requires great effort, then Shawna’s incomplete screenplay may also cost her her the win.
See, when it comes to actually writing the screenplays, I’m all hare. I can churn those babies out like Rumpelstiltskin and gold. But when it comes to trying to sell them, I’m sort of turtle-like. I’m a bit slow about it, if slow means making absolutely no effort at all.
Of course, at this moment in time, I have a real reason for making no effort, because I am patiently waiting (if patiently is completely impatiently) for Disney to realize my true greatness and send for me. The fellowship announcement draws nigh.
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November 21st, 2007 Riley
So, over at See Me Sell A Screenplay, I am about to be the initial victim of Shawna’s new screenplay coverage service. She is going to read my screenplay, grading it on several different criteria, and give it a final summation of worth. I don’t anticipate anything good to come of this. I mean, we’re in the middle of a war here. She’s not going to say, “This screenplay is kickass, and I expect to swallow plenty of floor cleaner when I am taken by the feet and used as a mop at the end of this contest.” No. She’s going to make it seem as if she stands a chance with a still unfinished screenplay and a twisted kind of optimism. No worries. She doesn’t.
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November 12th, 2007 Riley
So, now that I know it must be done, what steps will best lead me in the direction of kicking tripe ass?
1. Write a better screenplay than Team Tripe.
Already done. Team Tripe is having a bit of a hard time getting that first screenplay in the bag, so just having written a screenplay period puts me in the lead.
And even when Team Tripe manages to complete a screenplay, it’s nothing to worry about. After all, there is a reason I am called Team Talent.
2. Buy some cheerleaders.
If there is one thing that Team Tripe has excelled in, it is gathering a fan base. I’m a bit confused as to why this has occurred. Team Tripe’s only claims to fame
are an unnatural desire to sell a screenplay before me and sarcasm-laced quick wit.
3. Try to sell a screenplay.
This may just be my stumbling block. Apparently, a screenplay will not sell on wishing alone. There may actually be some work involved. Though I do have every
intention of racing the kids to the wishbone on Thanksgiving, just in case.
4. Plead my case to the universe.
In accordance with The Secret, it shall respond in kind.
5. Receive my accolades.
This is the part that I am really looking forward to, the part where I do nothing and gorgeous Italian and Latina women fan me with large branches and feed me
Concord grapes. Then, after I’ve chewed off the tart and tasty outside, they put their lips to mine and suck out the seeds like a Hoover.
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November 11th, 2007 Riley
The best thing about starting a new job on Monday is that we are going to have everything paid off super fast, leaving a practically non-existent debt, which is relative, since the roughly one hundred and fifty thousand dollar student loan debt will still be firmly in place. The worst thing about starting a new job on Monday is that it puts a hamper on my ability to do whatever I want whenever I want, and, call me crazy, but I kind of like that freedom. So, now that I am going to be starting said job, I need to figure out exactly when I am going to do everything that I must do, and that definitely includes finding time to kick tripe ass in the screenplay contest. Working for debt-relief is absolutely no excuse to fold. I must still win. It’s imperative.
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November 6th, 2007 Riley
I have not won a contest. I have not been writing query letters. I have been in a funk, and, no, I don’t mean a KC & the Sunshine Band “gettin’ down tonight” kind of funk. I haven’t even been writing. And that, childrens, makes me a cranky little ho.
So, the question becomes, should I just throw in the towel? Should I forfeit the victory to Team Tripe and be done with it? The answer? No! Hell no!
This player doesn’t fold. I’ve got a few more tricks up my sleeve. Beware, Team Tripe, my chips are all in and the odds are in my favor.
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October 31st, 2007 Riley
It seems that Team Tripe has made an attempt to commandeer my blog for the sole purpose of talkin’ smack. This occurred while I was asleep, as Team Tripe is well aware that my ninja skills would have prevented such an underhanded takeover had I been conscious. While I could put the kibosh on this juvenile behavior, I won’t. Let Team Tripe come and talk all the smack in the Team Tripe arsenal. It will only further delay progress on Team Tripe’s STILL uncompleted screenplay.
It is going to be very difficult to sell a script before I do, Team Tripe, when you do not, in fact, have a script to sell.
And as for your godspeed? Keep it. You need it more than I do.
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October 17th, 2007 Riley
To make The Secret work for me, I must state what I want. These are the things I want now. Right now. Or as quickly as possible. It is only a small sample.
1. The Disney Fellowship - I have submitted the required materials, notarized. I have explained who I am to them, what I have to offer. I have submitted my most suitable work. I have done what I can do. And I do want it. The law of attraction says that it will be mine.
2. To make Best Women - Ah, my other focus, which has become somewhat lost beneath the excitement of The Secret. As you know, it’s the movie I want to make the most, and now I will.
3. To get paid to write - Ask me how much money I’ve made with writing. Ask me how much I have spent with writing. Now ask me if that huge discrepancy between cost and earning has deterred me from my dream. The answer is… at times. But that is all in the past. Now I know The Secret.
4. To beat Team Tripe in our screenplay contest. I deserve to win. I should win. I will win. Because I’m worth it.
5. Half a million dollars. Most people ask for a million. Note how I’m not greedy like that.
Posted in Best Women: the journey, Screenplay contest, The Secret: Shh | 1 Comment »
October 11th, 2007 Riley
So, yes, I am going to refocus on finding a way to make Best Women. It’s a worthy goal, but do not fear. This in no way means that the contest between Team Talent and Team Tripe has come to a close or that I am forfeiting. I still have every intention of kicking tripe ass with one of my many other superb screenplays.
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May 17th, 2007 Riley
Every time I see Shawna sit down to do an index card for her thirty days to greatness plan, or looking up scripts online to get ideas, I think to myself “I am so fucking screwed.” She is going to write her first screenplay, and she is going to sell it before me. She is, because, while I am writing what bubbles up from my incredibly overactive soul, she is finding all of her inspiration in the Hollywood shit-pile of ideas. And she is going to kick my ass because of it. Damn her for being such a Tripe Ninja.
Posted in Screenplay contest | 3 Comments »
