I admit that, on occasion, I develop a bad case of sailor mouth. Now, it’s not like I go around every day, spewing forth all the naughty words that I have in my arsenal, but I don’t, in any way, attempt to refrain from using colorful wording when I feel that a situation calls for it.

Whenever there is a soapbox anywhere in the vicinity, I have a knack for inventing phrases that would make Jesus blush, put his fingers to his lips, and say “Oh my.”

And while I know there are people who attempt to abstain from cussing, and I applaud those efforts, I honestly don’t see how you verbally punctuate. You see, I can say “I don’t want to go with you,” and it certainly has meaning, but it’s just a statement. If I say “I don’t want to fucking go with you,” now it’s a bold exclamation… and I don’t even have to raise my voice.

Anyway, as often happens, I sidetracked myself, and I am returning to my original point now.

This morning, as I was walking to the car to come to this hell hole, I spontaneously said “WT Fuck.” That’s like WTF with the fuck left in. Then, after a good laugh at myself, I decided that I’m going to start talking that way. I’m going to use the cussing acronyms that have become widely popular, but then throw in a twist at the end by exclaiming the dirty word.

WT Fuck & S.O. Bitch

And then, when people give me the look, I’m going to cackle gleefully, kick them in the shins, and run!