Place this on the list of calls you don’t ever think that you will get. It started with an invitation to my nephew’s birthday party. Nothing unusual about that. Then, this is where it took a turn. The theme was TMNT (Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles for those of us old enough to have grown up in a time when the attention spans of children weren’t so short that everything had to be turned into an acronym). There were TMNT favors, TMNT cake, TMNT games, the works. One of those games included Follow the Master, which is basically follow the leader with chill ninja moves. Apparently, if my sister (the mom) played the Master, that would be stupid. (The kids’ description, not mine. I think my sister would be a fine Master Mom, as she dubbed herself.) Then, my oldest nephew Christian apparently dropped my name. Apparently, if I was the Ninja Master, the game would suddenly be cool. Apparently, you can’t have a good time without me. So, my sister said on the phone, “I guess what I’m trying to ask is, will you be the Ninja Master at Noah’s party?” That is the coolest question that I will sadly never hear again.

But I was. I was the Ninja Master and I was awesome.