Today is a very important day. My friend Pam (aka Pammykins) is 30 years old today. This is an homage… said with a hard ‘o’ and a slightly British accent.

Oh, Pammykins, what we have been through together, my love. We’ve survived on cafeteria food, posted flyers up around a Bible-Thumping Baptist campus, absconded in the middle of the work week for a whirlwind two-day vacation, almost been arrested in a Hendersonville Park, lied to authority. We have not committed murder, dropped a dumpster on Ann Coulter, or taken part in a threesome together, but I have high hopes for our future.

I hope you have had the loveliest of birfin’ days, and I hope you don’t feel as old as you are.