So I just got a call about my new job from my staffing agency contact, and she was scared to leave my pay rate on my answering machine, instead just stating it would be the higher of the two numbers I had mentioned on her voice mail. My first thought was, “Why is she scared of leaving the pay rate on the answering machine?” It’s not like the pay rate is a child molester and the answering machine is a playground. Then, I realized that she probably didn’t want to leave it because she doesn’t know who I might live with. This led me to a general conclusion that I believe can benefit humanity entire:

Never live with anyone you cannot trust with your pay rate, your tax returns, or your children. If anyone in your household falls into one of these categories, change the locks when they are out. If they fall into all three, knife them in their sleep.