I know that my great aunt is eighty-seven years old and spent her entire life in a po-dunk town with a po-dunk frame of mind, so I accept the fact that she is, for no better way to put it, a bigot. What bothers me is that she expects me to share in her bigoted world views, and feels the need to proclaim them to me. I want to be respectful, but she makes it really, really difficult. I end up incredibly angry the majority of the time when I get off the phone with her, because I have held my tongue and then feel as if I am condoning her bigotry.

The other day, it happened to be a conversation about a woman I went to high school with a lifetime ago. The conversation was tedious, first of all, because it was ten years ago and we weren’t the best of friends and I honestly don’t care what this woman is doing. It’s the purpose of these conversations with my aunt that always really drive me up the wall though. There is always something negative to report, and this one is always one of my favorites. Apparently, the woman I went to high school with is getting married and there is a rumor that it is to a, *GASP*, black man.

Well, sound the alarm and hold the fuckin’ presses. An interracial couple? What great strife this revelation has caused me! How will I ever go on? And the real kicker for me about this is that she knows that I am gay! How does she think I am going to react to the news of an interracial couple? With revulsion? I know that’s how she wants me to react.

History lesson: Interracial marriage was legalized in this slow-ass puritan society in 1967. Gay marriage is still an issue that won’t be resolved any time in the near future. So, let’s bring some focus here. I, not my friend from high school, am the abomination. I am the social deviant. If I had been in Salem three hundred years ago, I would have likely been convicted of witchcraft and burned at the stake (which would have been kind of cool actually).

“She’s old and set in her ways.” I try to think this to keep from getting angry with her, but it doesn’t always work. My main issue is that she feels the need to consistently whisper those thoughts in my ear, and she’s not the only old, set in her ways person who is doing it. While I have my will and I like to think it’s strong, there are a lot of people a lot more susceptible than me.

Ah, old people and The Bible, keeping the world intolerant since 1455.