So, last weekend we drove down and back from Nashville in two days, because Shawna’s grandfather decided to up and die on us. Now before you go all sniffling and making ‘awwww’ sounds, he was old and he’d had a full life of making people miserable. I am talking about one of those people so mean that when we found out he died in the hospital, Shawna asked if there was a wildcat loose in there, because there is no way this man kicked it any other way than facing down an animal bigger and meaner than himself. He’d been shot like three times, by different men, for being with different wives. Let’s just say, he’d lived his life. And that’s not even the point. The point is, we have things we need to be getting done, important things to make a difference in our own lives, lives that are not where they should be or where we would like them to be. But this old geezer kicks it and we had to go, because there would be too much fallout if we didn’t show up. So we spent a whole two days driving to and from Nashville, with only a small pit stop to do some laundry and hear that if we find Jesus we will live with him in eternity, but if we don’t, we will burn in hell. Ah, I love a good revival… er, funeral. 

I just can’t wrap my warped mind around the idea of the funeral. People will live right next to someone their entire lives, and never make the effort to walk across the lawn and visit, but the person dies and they are at the funeral home for three days in a row every hour it’s open. And they think that it is an important thing to do to honor the person. Well, here’s a thought. Why not honor them while they are alive? Why not go visit once in a while or engage in a conversation where you come away actually knowing something about them? Just a thought. 

Funerals are really just absurd. Most of the people there aren’t really that close to the person. They are just room fillers. And for those people who are very close to the person, why is it such a good idea for them to be out in public for the world to see when they are trying to grieve? But, of course, since we heard stories about people at the funeral competing over who got the most flower arrangements, and people stealing food from the funeral home, and more than one person wonder aloud when they would be reading the will, I guess maybe funerals aren’t about the dead person at all. 

My brother, in his infinite wisdom, told us that he wants a roast instead of a funeral, everyone getting up and calling him a chump, instead of being all depressed. I’m really starting to think he is onto something. I also read recently, in an interview with Rachel McAdams : ), that you can be dumped into the ocean to become part of a coral reef. So, fodder for my friends and relatives or dolphin food, right now either one seems preferable to lying in a wood box and listening to “Go Rest High on That Mountain.”